Misplaced Love Actually

Dear Diary,

After reading one of today’s newspapers, I had a chilling thought.  What happens if someone falls in love with you and it’s not reciprocated? Two unfortunate women in India found out: one was beheaded and the other was doused in kerosene and died in hospital, her mother also murdered by the same vengeful man.

I tell others of stories like this not as a side-show spectacle as I am British and something like that would never happen in the UK but as a citizen and woman genuinely worried and struggling to understand the mental instability behind such crimes.

These young women were apparently oblivious to the men who were attracted to them and these are two separate stories about five days apart as reported by the press.  One woman was only 17 years old attending college at the time of her murder.  The murderer was overpowered by fellow students and handed to the police but how did he carry a sword into the building? Police described the case as a one-sidded love story, however, I struggle to see love – only possession and a crime.  I went to Uni when I was 17, I was so innocent and flirty, could it have landed me in this much trouble in another culture?

The other young woman (21) was due to get married but was murdered by a man who claimed to love her even though he already had a wife and two children. He killed himself in the same manner as his victim but yet again, I feel the sheer rage is about possession.

The grossly violent nature of these crimes makes me shudder, what could help to prevent such behaviour in the future? I was thinking if people should be taught to ask for help and counselling but that would mean they would have to be conscious of having irrational behaviour.  I am unqualified to suggest help for the men or protection from the unknown for the women…it’s a scary world.

Bubbly

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3 Comments to “Misplaced Love Actually”

  1. Oh this is so gruesome. Crimes of passion are irrational. It isn’t about love. I do not see how this is love. This is obsession and possession. The sadness of these crimes are it could happen to anyone.

  2. This post reminds me of a movie I watched a few nights ago – Kiss the Girls. It’s about serial killer who stalks high-achieving women and then kidnaps them and holds them in an underround prison. He actually belives he is in love with these women, but is a control freak who drugs them and wants them to remain subservient. He punishes them with death if they behave badly and don’t do as he says.

    These men you talk about sound exactly like this (fictional) control freak serial killer. I guess the fiction has its basis in true stories – it’s a chilling thought. But it shows that these kind of things don’t just happen in India, they happen all over the world.

  3. Mysterious Pinkie – surely the types of crimes committed against women in the sub-continent are particularly gruesome?

    Unrequited love is common in all cultures of course but you hear of a lot of more disgusting crimes against women from Pakistan, India, B/desh etc. In Bangladesh, throwing battery acid on a woman has become so common-place that the authorities have had to criminalise vendors who sell battery acid if they sell an unusual amount to someone or is acting suspiciously.

    The terrible irony of course is that these women are brought up to not mess around with boys etc and then when they don’t they are punished for it.

    Obviously these men are sick but the sheer number of atrocities such as these against women mean that there is something else going on – it’s a really sick possessionary issue – if I can’t have you no-one else can either.

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