Sari or No Sari?

Dear Diary,

Why is it that whenever there is an Asian event, the women go all dressed up in their Asian clothing and the men go just as they are? Sometimes men barely manage to put on a suit nevermind a Kurta and if a woman would turn up in her casual English attire, she would be stared at, judged and gossiped about.

I am preparing for my cousin’s wedding and my Mum is rather displeased that I am choosing not to wear a sari. My cousin isn’t even marrying an Indian, yet I am supposed to demonstrate my “Indianess” by wearing a sari.  As if my colour of skin wouldn’t give that away.

Whilst I love wearing saris, I find that I am wearing them more these days because it is the most appropriate thing to wear rather because I really want to. With two young children, I do find these heavily bejewelled saris quite difficult to manage and, do admire the women who can carry them off effortlessly all day.

I feel quite rebellious with my desire to wear something other than a sari. I really do fancy turning up to my cousin’s wedding in Scotland wearing a Kilt!!

Maybe I will compromise and add a salwaar to the Kilt!


5 Comments to “Sari or No Sari?”

  1. HI Bunty,

    I’m sure you would be the talk fo the wedding in a kilt, and very hot – 6m of pure wool the kilt is very similar in length and drape to the sari.

    Men with good thighs look so handsome in a kilt…

    Back to your post, I think you should enjoy it. A sari is annoying sometimes but they are one of the most elegant forms of dress in the world and I think it’s really special to dress up. I used to love seeing my mum all dressed up when I was a kid and it made the event more interesting. I am quite exceptional though, one of my mum’s pet names for me as a child was ‘decoration’!

    Men still have to wear suits to weddings and not all men enjoy them so I am sure they suffer as much as you.

  2. Saris are such a pain to wear. They don’t look elegant at all if they’re half falling off you and unravelling. You have to be an expert to wear put them on properly and even more of an expert not to step on it as you walk.

    Give me a dress anyday!

  3. saris are overrated – how many women over 35 actually look like your photo? I usually have fat flaps hanging over .. Mmmmm!

    Do you still care what your mum thinks? Obviously not, well done! We HAVE to get rid of the “what will the neighbours think” attitude in our communities. If your cousin is marrying a scoattish ginge noone will notice what you’re wearing!!

  4. Managing two kids in a heavy sari is a right pain. You don’t feel beautiful or decorated, just down right uncomfortable. I used to love wearing saris but I much prefer easier outfits that don’t end up falling off when you have kids hanging off you.
    Myla, you are right, we do need to change attitudes in our communities. Whether I wear a sari or not should not really be important here and I should not be judged on not wearing one.

  5. Bunty, I am almost 35 years old and I wouldn’t DARE wear a dress from Reiss to an asian wedding – unless my mother was not invited. Which is unlikely.

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