The Boy Is Mine

Imagine that the social stigma for delivering a baby girl is so high that some women deny that they gave birth to a girl and claim that their baby boy was taken from them after birth.  Imagine that you’re an oldie enjoying retirement and four middle aged people turn up at your door claiming to be your children and demanding property and inheritance rights.

These two examples demonstrate the type of ‘social’ cases that a crime lab in Bangalore helps to solve. Set up originally to help solve criminal cases, social cases now amount to 50% of the lab’s workload.

It is sad but apparently common that some women really do claim their boy was swapped at birth by hospital staff, however,  most of these cases are disproved by DNA tests from the lab.  I have never given birth and don’t know if the corny scenes I see on TV about the mother/baby bond are true but imagine the trauma for all concerned.  Does the mother push her new baby away? What does the mother do once the DNA test confirms the girl is hers and how is she and the baby girl treated once the truth is unveiled by the double helix?


4 Comments to “The Boy Is Mine”

  1. Hi Bubbly,
    I had to laugh at this because I am really getting annoyed with these women who cannot cherish girls. How do women live with themselves. Were they hated and so impart the hatred onto their children?….. When are women going to embrace themselves and start changing this horrible and prehistoric cultural imprint.
    I sometimes get the feeling that these Asian’s who feel like this need counselling or some sort of therapy.

  2. bunty i agree, i just dont understand what these women are thinking.

  3. I think you miss the point somewhat – how these women were treated when they were growing up is irrelevant. They belong to a society in which to “seal the deal” ie security means to give birth to a boy. In your previous article Bunty you say that you are constantly having comments made at you to encourage you have another child as you only have girls at the moment.

    So you are strong-willed enough not to buckly under that pressure, but these women do not have that luxury. Their mother in laws will treat them like dirt and they will live under a constant threat of divorce so that their husbands can try elsewhere.

    To be that desperate to have a boy – so much so that you would convince yourself that your boy must have been swapped with somone’s else’s girl is tragic. And the cycle will continue.

    It’s all very well to be high and mighty about it all sitting in England but we do not belong to their world. I am glad that we are changing things .. but we are not much better, my friend is pregnant and has been told she is having a girl. The disappointment on her face is very obvious.

  4. Yes it is tragic which is why it makes me hysterical. There is always something put onto women to “seal the deal” as you call it. And it seems to me that much of these cultural cycles are continued by mother-in-laws, which makes me wonder whether they impart this behaviour because they have encountered it.
    I agree that we are not much better in the UK and have similar issues here with births of girls. I have experienced the constant badgering and know others who have been affected by it too. When speaking about “women embrace themselves”, I did mean women all over the world not just those in India.
    You are right it is all to easy to sit in England and be high and mighty, but being critical of a behaviour that you don’t agree with isn’t doing this. I have extreme empathy with women who are not able to stand up for themselves, but what makes me furious is when those women then pass on those behaviours to their children.

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