Platform by Michel Houellebecq

Well it’s been a long time since I read such crap. I’m not an avid reader of the french novel or peruser of their “great” cinema but apart from a few notable classics (in French but not necessarily from France, Camus coming to mind) I’ve always had a narrow-minded notion that The French are inherently sexist and it won’t wash well with me.
I know beauty is subjective but when Depardieu is cast alongside Audrey Tatou a little piece of me sighs in that awful way I used to when a fat Rishi Kapoor would be in a BHS sweater dancing with a teenage Sri Devi with her tits out.
Houllebecq doesn’t disappoint my prejudices – it is the first time I’ve read a book because I know the main guy fails in the end.
I wonder if I were an ugly guy in my 40s and I listed all my fantasies, then all of those would appear in this book. But not in a hot way, in a cliché sort of boring way (lesbian, S+M, sex with underage girl etc). It is so cliché that I think the author is cleverer than that and he is actually being ironic.
Interestingly the book is funny in parts and the narration is  different and often takes you by surprise.  But but but. It just isn’t worth the effort and I was quite happy in the world without knowing that there may be a man in the world that is thinking “yes, I could see that a Muslim vagina is probably attractive” hahahahah. Thank you mate!
So is he so clever that he’s being ironic and deliberately offensive (black men described thug like with large penises and black women as overtly sexual and exotic, both often described as “African”!!) or is he so stupid that his target audience is a spotty fat teenage boy? I have no idea. All I know is I wish I hadn’t persisted in reading to the end and just got on with washing my gym kit or something else. And that spotty fat teenage boys don’t read this stuff either.
One last question Mr Houellebecq, who the hell is the naked girl on the cover? She’s blond and there isn’t a single blond in your whole stupid book. I am seriously pissed off because I should have judged your rubbish book by its cover but I didn’t!

One Comment to “Platform by Michel Houellebecq”

  1. Thanks for saving my time for another book!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: